Sorry about the hiatus. It’s been a while. College has been a crazy transition.
Anyways, thoughts on this transition:
So, I’m a transfer student. I’ve already had a year of college on my belt. I’m used to change, used to showing up in less than a dozen classrooms the first day of school, being around new people, teachers, and such.
Such changes would stress me out, and such was the case my first week of being a freshman, but I found that eventually the stress goes away and everything feels normal.
I get easily worked up about homework and new classes, but in the end there is nothing to worry about, and I feel fine.
I was a commuter then. I’m living in a dorm now. That stressed me out.
I told myself, “Just wait a week or two. It will feel normal.”
And it did. There’s something comforting about that. I know many people who struggle with change, and I’ve always thought of myself as someone who struggled with change. I’m not willing to make drastic changes, just because I know I will offset my emotional balance. Why change when I feel great right now?
However, I have been able to trust my emotions and trust God to help me get through change. Somehow, with Him, I can bounce back from change and feel fine.
I’ve trusted God to help me make new friends. As long as I have one good friend I would be fine.
God blessed me with dozens of new friends. I’ve been more extroverted this past month than I have my entire life.
It’s been a good month so far.
It feels incredibly odd, and sometime depressing, living here now. I feel as though every moment spent is one gained, whether it’s hanging out with friends or finally learning things in classes I actually want to be in. Perks of not being a freshman.
Yet, I feel like I’m losing time with others. Before, I had one life. That life was spent at home, with family. Dinner time would just be a retelling of events that took place that day. “How was your day? What’d you do today?” I already knew what everyone did that day.
Now, I have two lives. One is spent here on campus, and the other is several hours away. I’m having hundreds of great experiences here, even in just the span of a month. However, I’m losing time spent in my other life. I don’t know what happened everyday with my siblings and parents. That’s just the bittersweet reality of, well, growing up.
First-year students are required to take a worldview class their first semester. I’m taking one on C. S. Lewis and the Chronicles of Narnia (Obviously, I’m quite enjoying it).
My professor had an interesting idea, relating college to Narnia.
Like Lucy, I have passed through the wardrobe and made it here to a “magical” land of new friends, new teachers, amazing experiences. I will spend years here and have dozens of fulfilling experiences crammed into the span of a single semester.
Yet, when I get back home for, say, Thanksgiving, and when I’m passing back through the wardrobe, it will appear as though no time has passed. It will seem to me that only minutes have gone by. (Not literally, but again, I relate this to what happens to the kids at the end of the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe). Not much change will most likely take place for my family. It will be an odd experience, having, well, experienced so much yet coming back to little change. It will be impossible to relate to my family all of the amazing events that took place for me.
So far, this month has been an odd conglomerate of emotions and experiences. And I will try my best not to forget to write on INFP-ness, emotions, and such.