The Thoughts I Don’t Speak

The many people in my life blur together whenever I think back on my life as I wonder what would have happened if I said what I thought. So many thoughts. So many emotions. Too much to put books, even the clarity of writing would be futile at the vastness of it all. Thoughts buzz…

Ambiguous

My reality remains ambiguous, uncertain, vague. Never knowing, always wondering. Never seeing, always wishing. I worry what others think of me. I worry that if I don’t think right, look right, or seem like I have everything together and an exuberant personality and charm to match my life, people won’t like me. People won’t notice…

Unreachable

I’m never enough. Why must my dreams be so cut off from reality? Why is there no intersection of fantasy and fact? Life is never as perfect as I dream it to be, and I am never as whole as everyone seems to be around me. Why must I be different? Apart from everyone? All…

A Moment

This is just a random stream of thought I had late at night in the library. The library is loud with a cacophony of colors as people walk around. They are quiet, yet loud with their movement. I should be studying. Instead, I feel sentimental. Nostalgic. Melancholic. Most of the time, I surrender to my…

The INFP College Experience

My first semester living on campus is almost to a close. Crazy how life-changing 3 months can be. Sorry for the late post, I’ll mention. Felt the need to both write something and reminisce for once on the experiences of the past semester, thus the purpose of this post. Like the title suggests, this post…

Aesthetic

At the college I go to, there is a “cafe” in one of the student centers that has several snacks and drinks for students to buy. Usually if I want to buy something sweet but relatively cheap, I’ll get a glass bottle of soda. My friends will often ask why I’m getting the glass bottle…

The Insincerity of Time

I am constantly surprised by how much I realize about myself as I grow older. Some days, I feel I’m as innocent as a child to the human condition, oblivious to how people think and feel. Other days, I feel wise in comparison to others around me, seeing things and patterns that hardly anyone in…

How I Met Your Mother – Nostalgia & Meaning

A friend recently showed me HIMYM, and as sitcoms go, it is amazing. Each episode is unique, original, and legitimately funny, unlike some sitcoms. How I Met Your Mother is about a guy named Ted Mosby. Father of two kids, he tells them through flashbacks the epic journey he and his four best friends took…

Hiatus (Thoughts on A New College Semester)

Sorry about the hiatus. It’s been a while. College has been a crazy transition. Anyways, thoughts on this transition: So, I’m a transfer student. I’ve already had a year of college on my belt. I’m used to change, used to showing up in less than a dozen classrooms the first day of school, being around new people, teachers, and such. Such changes…

The Paradoxical Personality of the INFP

INFPs are fickle creatures. They are guided by their emotions; whichever way the wind blows, that’s where the INFP will go. Thus, the INFP often portrays traits that seem to go against previous traits they’ve shown. This can often create confusion among close friends and family because of the INFP’s ever changing moods and desires,…

A Stream of Thoughts – #1

I would like to say I’m a deep thinker, not to derive any pride from it, just to give me more of a sense of self. However, I hope and believe that most people think these things I have written below every now and then, and if not, here they are for all to see….

Perfection

It’s hard for me to see the world the way it truly is. I’ve mentioned in past posts how I live in two worlds, fantasy and reality. Often, my body occupies reality while my mind is usually in fantasy. Sure, I appreciate wonders reality has to offer, like the beauty in nature or the wonder…